well written but really didn't work for me..
I was going through a horrible breakup with my ex-fiancee, so I ordered this book. Even though it was a mutual thing there was once such a strong love that my heart was broken and I needed help. Some of the exercises and thinking in the book were helpful. But really I have not found one book that can cure a broken heart. The best things you can do is follow your dreams, go out with your true friends, and go on vacation- get your hair done, nails, spa sessions.. Make yourself feel beautiful and more confident and in time your heart will mend.. ;)

Why We Pick The Mates We Do
Paul McKenna has been so gracious as to include a reference to my book, WHY WE PICK THE MATES WE DO, in his book, HOW TO MEND A BROKEN HEART. My book focuses on how to know BEFORE you begin an intimate relationship with a potential partner whether or not the relationship will work out AFTER you two have gotten involved.

Paul's book gives effective ways to deal with the pain of those "broken" relationships that you may wish you had never gotten involved in in the first place. He gives many effective tips for salvaging your self-esteem, re-building the courage to begin again, and finding the wisdom to pick another type of partner, one who can give you the kind of relatonship you wanted in the first place.

As a testimonial in my book, Paul wrote, "I have long suspected that the tradiitioal psychological view that our adult lives are spent trying to compensate for the unmet needs of our childhood, is only part of the picture. I believe Anne Teachworth's work is important, because she has discovered some of the missing parts. Through her excellent book, you can, too. Not only will you find it fascinating, but life changing, too."

I sincerely thank Paul for his endorsement of my Psychogenetic System of Transgenerational Couple Counseling in WHY WE PICK THE MATES WE DO, especially since I have long greatly admired his astounding skills as a hypnotist and the sincere compassion and dedication he has always had in helping people remove their unconscious blocks to living lives of love, happiness and success.

THIS BOOK IS GREAT!!!
OK, I'm a guy and trying to get over my ex of less then 8 months being with her, it has taken me over 6 months to try to move on.
I went to the Library to just search for something AGAIN as ALWAYS but this time the book on the shelf stood out. Never seen it before. Something was telling me to get it.
I could not put this book down when I got home.I read it cover to cover in one evening. The small work Exercises in this book are really great, I mean REALLY GREAT AND FAST to do and you can remember for every day use. I like the "SELF-ESTEEM BOOSTER" and " HOW TO FALL OUT OF LOVE". The next day I had to order it on line. I took notes for keeping. And when I get my book it will be highlighted alot on things to remember.
I have bought many on line e-books on getting over your mate, and things like that, but this book is really great to get. Don't waste you money on E-books out there. Put your money on this book first. It may not be the the best for you, but it moved me, made me cry sometimes reading it, but it was for the good. GET THE BOOK!!!

Right time, right book, lucky me
During the two months after my break up, I went through a roller coaster ride. My emotions were everywhere, and worst of all, when I felt better, I always feared that it was just my imagination and that I would soon feel worse again. I got a lot of support from my friends and family, but inside my brain painful images that reminded me of my past would pop up involuntarily from time to time.

The biggest obstacle this book has helped me overcome is related to the fact that one of its authors is a hypnotist. I have only read half way through the book, but I believe I have found everything that I needed already. The techniques they presented in the first half uses a semi-hypnotic sort of way to help you manipulate and recode your memories so that you can change your way of thinking - from the root. Ever since following the instructions in the book, I really do feel like I was able to stop thinking about my ex and stop feeling pained.

I think most books helping you deal with break ups are shallow. Many books are just out to make a buck on someone who is desperate for help. This book is much better than the other break up book I bought, but books alone cannot help you get over a heartbreak. I would recommend this to someone who is looking for that last thing to help them completely get over their break up.

Some Good Advice, But Not Totally Realistic
Although this book contains some helpful information, I wouldn't go so far as to say that it lived up to the author's claims of being able to "stop the pain of a broken heart in its tracks and bring about lasting improvements..." in my life, anyway. But then, maybe my situation is a bit different from those which Drs. McKenna and Willbourn reported.

That's not to say, however, that it won't work for others. Obviously, all our situations are different; consequently others will be affected or respond to this information much differently. But then, while I want the pain to stop, I'm not willing to stop loving my ex, which is where the good doctors' techniques ultimately lead the reader. Granted, falling out of love is the ultimate goal for many who wish to get over their exes. But at the same time, for many others - such as myself - it is not.

I also found their advice on eliminating jealousy and obsession by utilizing a technique to `white it out' not only rather simplistic, but unrealistic. For some - both men and women - being able to let go of either obsession or jealousy is hardly as easy as pretending that it can be erased. Just like love, jealousy and obsession are two very powerful emotions that take time to work through. This, I would posit, is where the utilization of Neuro-linguistic Programming (NLP), hypnosis, retraining and reframing are, in my humble opinion, more likely to work; along with a good dose of cognitive behavior therapy.

The reference to New Orleans Gestalt therapist, Anne Teachworth's theory, that we learn to relate to significant others based on the relational interactions we observed in our parents, resonated strongly. Although, certainly, there are often other factors involved, but there's no arguing (and quite a few studies in support of the contention) that - for the most part - children learn by emulating what they see and hear. Therefore, it only stands to reason that we are most likely going to carry these learned behaviors with us into adulthood and into our own relationships.

Once again, although the doctors offered some good advice, I was also struck by the fact that an equal amount of advice seemed insensitive and aimed at women while not taking into consideration that women don't think or respond similarly. Case in point: "Your past is your job to deal with. It is not your new partner's job. So rather than foist it on them, work through it with a friend or a therapist." `Foist'? This is the way most men think. It is not, generally, the way women think. Many women, in fact, are usually all too willing to hear about their partner's past issues if their partner is willing to share that part of their life with them. Additionally, in some cases this advice is not feasible, such as when one partner truly has no one else to talk to and is in dire need of talking about a situation that is potentially life-threatening. It appears that chivalry must, most certainly, be dead.

So...how does one mend a broken heart? I never quite reached the point by the end of the book where I felt that my broken heart had been mended by the advice offered. In my opinion, this can only be done by learning to love oneself. Because by loving ourselves we realize that we are deserving of love from others and that we deserve more than a partner who has chosen not to remain in our lives. Only then can one learn to let go of the pain of a broken relationship and go on to truly love another.

And, in case you're wondering...it took reading this book for me to see that I really didn't need anyone to tell me how to let go of the pain of my broken heart. The answer was always within.