SMACKDOWN's Best Kept Secret
This PPV was one of the year's best, and I'll bet you've never even heard about it. I'm gonna skip the usual intro, and just get to the event. Hope you like:
PPV REVIEW
***First, SMACKDOWM GM Stephanie McMahon welcomed us to the first-ever brand-exclusive PPV. I'll admit, I thought BAD BLOOD & VENGEANCE '03 were the first. She regretfully informed us that Undertaker wouldn't be able to participate in the main event, but that Edge would take his place. As if that wasn't exciting, she also kicked off the show by announcing an interpromotional contest. Stephanie's opening announcements are quick, crowd-pleasing, and hold up on DVD.***
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1) Booker T (RAW) v. Matt Hardy (SMACKDOWN)
---This PPV opener actually started off with some good crowd-playing, as both Hardy & Booker kept daring the other to make the first move. After the mind games ended, the match proceeded with a fast pace, and was filled with back-and-forth action. Unforunately, it still wasn't as great it sounds. You see, even with all of the high-impact slams and counters, I could predict almost every move that was coming. I can't decide if this was by-the numbers yet entertaining, or entertaining but by-the-numbers. I'm leaning toward the latter.
"6.0 / 10"
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2) John Cena & Dawn Marie v. Billy Kidman & Torrie Wilson
---This was when the horrible Al Wilson storyline just began. Thankfully, this match was so entertaining that I forgot all about the angle. Things played out the way you'd hope: Cena & Kidman did most of the work, while Torrie & Dawn Marie rarely mixed it up. I urge anti-Cena fans to take a look, because he and Kidman did some impressive work against each other. This match just goes to show that Cena "CAN" wrestle; he just doesn't show it very often. And the Divas were pretty entertaining when they competed. Overall, a very exciting Intergender Match, and easily one of the best ones I've ever seen.
"7.0 / 10"
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3) Funaki v. Crash
---This exhibition showing may just be the best match I've witnessed involving either of these men. This Cruiserweight competition was incredibly fast-paced, and made both men look like main event players. Even better, this match was given a pretty good amount of time to develop, and let both men entertain the crowd. Folks, I've never been a fan of the late Mike "Crash" Lockwood, but I will give him a ton of credit for his work on this night. Even though there was no reason for this match to take place, it's worthy of any PPV presentation.
"7.0 / 10"
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4) Elimination Match - Cruiserweight Championship
Tajiri v. Jamie Noble (champion) v. Rey Mysterio
---Don't get too excited if you're a Tajiri fan, because he was only in the match for about 4 minutes. The "Japanese Buzzsaw" was fun to watch while he was there, and his brief presence might disappoint some people. But after Mysterio & Noble went at it for about 15 more minutes, I didn't care. Remember when Chris Benoit & Kurt Angle had a Two-Out-of-Three Falls Match? Their first fall lasted a minute, but then the last two falls were Match-of-The-Year quality, so nobody cared. The same thing applies here. The high-risk spots and crisp wrestling on display here were breathtaking. Great match, if you can forget Tajiri was involved.
"8.0 / 10"
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***Right about here (I think) was when Eddie & Chavo Guerrero cut a hilarious promo that included anything & everything that came to their minds. If you've ever seen the 30 ROCK episode called "Jack-Tor" -- where Alec Baldwin's character goes through a 3-minute blooper reel -- then you'll know what I'm talking about. Los Guerreros just kept talking and bragging and trash-talking about anything they wanted...it just went on for so long that you'll laugh at the sheer audacity of it. Without question, one of the funniest backstage promos I've ever seen from the WWE.***
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5) The Big Valbowski & Chuck Palumbo
v. Reverend D-Von & Ron Simmons
---I have no clue why any of these men were paired with each other. That alone should tell you that not much happened in this match. However, I want to note that while this was a pointless 6 minutes, I wasn't bored. I always loved Val Venis, and each wrestler gets to do a little work before the finish. Most will likely call this the worst match of the PPV.
"6.0 / 10"
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6) Kiss-My-Arse Match
Albert v. Rikishi
---I know this might look horrible in print, but think about this: Rikishi & Albert are two of the most athletic big-man superstars that WWE has ever had. They're quick & agile for their size, in addition to being very strong. So because of their physiques, the two opponents actually delivered a decent back-and-forth contest. But what made the match more entertaining for me was the psychology. The whole match is filled with little touches that make it better. Albert's headbutt is stronger than his Samoan opponent's head, but Rikishi uses his behind to psyche out Albert. And the aftermath was actually pretty funny, as you'll get to see butt-kissing and horrible dancing (if that's your thing). I can't believe I gave this much typing to this one match, so the bottom line is: I thought this whole scenario was pretty amusing, and I think if you go in with an immature mind, you'll enjoy yourself.
"6.5 / 10"
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7) WWE Tag Team Championships
Los Guerreros v. Chris Benoit & Kurt Angle (champions)
---Alright, if this one doesn't get you excited, then you better skip the rest of my review. But if you remember the "SmackDown Six" like I do, then you know why REBELLION 2002 will be worth your time. Simply put, this tag team contest was just as good as any other SMACKDOWN match that involved the WWE Tag Titles back in late 2002. At first, the champions were dominating the challengers, which worried me a bit. But once Chavo gained control for his team, then the four genius minds created a memorable modern classic. There were so many pinfall attempts, unique double-teams, high-risk spots, false finishes, and finisher frenzies that I don't have enough space to tell them all. But I've been watching WWE for a long time, and there were moves & counters that I hadn't seen ever before. Please, do not deprive yourself of a truly forgotten classic.
"9.0 / 10"
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8) 1-on-2 Handicap Match - WWE Championship
Edge v. Brock Lesnar (champion) & Paul Heyman
---The writers & talent did an excellent job of hyping the main event, because more than anything else, they emphasized that Heyman could lose Lesnar's title. The match itself was exciting from start to finish. Edge, in his first WWE Title Match, was forced to use his speed and wits more than anything else. Lesnar, of course, used more power moves, in addition to his aggressive technical style. These two had such great chemistry that it's a shame we never got to see them square off again. Heyman's involvement in the match is very well done, too. He only interfered when necessary, and almost lost Lesnar's title on a couple occasions. This main event worked so well, I'm actually glad Undertaker didn't compete as advertised. Even though I knew who won the match going in, everything worked so well that I started second-guessing myself.
"8.0 / 10"
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DVD EXTRAS
* There is a pointless 30-second recap of REBELLION that aired on the following SMACKDOWN. There aren't even in-ring match clips; just pyro & crowd footage.
* Two featurettes -- one with John Cena, the other with Torrie Wilson -- follow a wrestler around Europe. The segment with Torrie Wilson is a brief, pleasant little video. The one with Cena is very funny, because he rips into a couple of things about England's culture (including the fans) that irk him. Man, Cena really got some good airtime on this DVD/
* Last but certainly not least, WWE included the European Title Match where Shawn Michaels won the belt from The British Bulldog. It was the ONE NIGHT ONLY PPV from Sept. 1997, and this was the first time the belt changed hands (Bulldog was the first in May '97). A very good match, to say the least.
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I consider myself to be a hardcore WWE fan. But, I was too arrogant to acknowledge that these UK PPVs existed. I told myself, "We never saw them in America, so they don't count." If you have that mindset, you need to kick yourself in the backside, and rethink your attitude.
Granted, none of these matches hold any major significance in WWE history. But because of the limited PPV coverage, REBELLION 2002 feels more like a house show. This whole event feels like the WWE was just trying to entertain the fans, without worrying about storylines or angles.
REBELLION 2002 is one of the best PPVs to be released since the brand split. Highly Recommended!
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